Confused

I try not to let the feeling I have for my mom be known to the kids. I want them to have a relationship with her though right now with limits ( she see them at my house). Today is J birthday and we were to have cake and ice cream and mother nature dumped a good foot of snow on us.

My inlaws called and said they may not make it but in the end did. I didnt expect my mom to come the weather is terrible my brother called and said he wasnt coming and doubted mom was either I said to him well it would be kind of nice if she would let me know ( there was supper involved). I finally called her at 4 30 and she said no she wasnt coming and hung up.

J asked me if she had called while he was at school or tonight to wish him a happy birthday. I said not yet J but its early. I didnt tell anyone about the conversation with my mom about why I choose today to have cake and icecream and I said well mom it is his birthday and she said but saturday or sunday would be better for me.

I want to tell him yes your grandma called and she didnt forget your birthday. But then its wrong to lie to your kids and I cant lie to him if I expect him to always be honest with me. I dont know what to do. Its hard sometimes between protecting them and being honest with them. His fire chief invited the kids go to sledding so I am going to put my feet up.